9. JCVD

JCVD
Mabrouk El Mechri, 2008

While trying to scrounge up some money to support a bitter custody battle for his daughter, washed-up movie star Jean-Claude Van Damme (Jean-Claude Van Damme) winds up in the middle of a bank robbery gone wrong.

There is a lot to like about this movie, starting with the brilliant opening credits sequence, which is a lengthy single-shot action scene in which Van Damme kills at least a couple of dozen people, using several guns, a giant pipe, and, of course, his own feet and fists. Of course, every movement is blatantly choreographed, much of the timing is off, and many of the punches don't come anywhere close to landing. But then, that's kind of the point.

Then you get to the body of the movie, which is the robbery. The story is nothing particularly novel, but it is solid enough that it would still have worked even if random actor X was playing celebrity action star Y, rather than Van Damme as Van Damme. It just wouldn't have worked as well. What is a little more interesting is the way that the story is presented, with a fractured chronology, scenes shown twice from different perspectives, and a handful of fourth-wall breaking moments including the centerpiece of the film, a six-minute monologue from Van Damme, delivered directly to the audience. It didn't really work, admittedly - but I really appreciate the attempt. Unfortunately, it all kind of falls apart as we move into the (somewhat) action-packed finale, which hurts the film quite a bit. Even then, though, Van Damme's surprisingly strong and naturalistic performance keeps it from going completely off the rails. This is, I suppose, a prime argument for why it's a good idea to let actors act in their native tongue (see also: Cruz, Penelope).

7/10